Some Ways to Practice Self-Care & Self-Love

With everything that is going on in the world right now, it’s extremely important that we take care of ourselves and practice ways to love ourselves even more. Here are some ways I try to practice self-care and self-love.

Better Sleeping Habits:

I’ve always been someone who doesn’t sleep well at all. Ever since I was a child I was a light sleeper. I wake up easily, and it is extremely hard for me to fall asleep. In the past I typically average about 4 hours of sleep a night (crazy, I know!). Everyone used to ask how I am able to function. I think we all require different amounts of sleep, and that amount changes as we grow up. As I’m not getting any younger, I now try to make sleep a priority. I make sure that I am getting at least 7 to 8 hours of sleep per night. Sleep has a big role in your temperament and affects your mood and overall health and wellness.

Meditation:

Meditation contributes to self-care and self-love. The purpose of meditation is just to sit in your body and be in your body, feeling your breath, and even feeling the discomfort and pain. I’ve been having some discomfort in my knee, and to be able to just focus on my breathing helps me push through it. I just stop everything and just allow myself to be with myself. I know I’ve spoke about meditation multiple times, however there are many different types of meditation that I practice. Shower meditation, sleeping meditation, and crystal meditation. 

A Day Off from Everything to do Nothing:

Sometimes we get in our head that we have to always be productive and accomplish something otherwise the day is wasted. This is not the case, and having time to spend on doing nothing is good once in a while for healing. For me this means just sitting around, lounging, and doing nothing. In actuality you have to have a rest day to recharge and not clean the house, go to work, etc. 

Taking Better Care of My Skin:

Since I’ve still been trying to get my eczema under control, this means I am constantly making an effort to take better care of my skin. I have been trying to follow my eczema diet by not consuming dairy products, eggs, or gluten. It has been hard and 3 days out of the week I tend to slip up, but I am now consciously making more of an effort than I have ever done before. I avoid long hot showers and make sure to moisturize my skin right after I jump out of the shower (literally!). 

I’d love to hear what are some ways that you practice self-care and self-love? There are so many ways to practice self-care and self-love, these are just some of the simple ways that I practice mine. We really don’t realize the positive effects it can have on our lives by just doing some of these practical things.

Xoxo

Welcome to the Dark Side and the Importance of Shadow Work

Whether you’re trying to battle your inner-demons or have a dark shadow that seems to follow you wherever you go, the reality is we all have them. Some of us more than others. We all have a dark side somewhere deep inside of ourselves. 

If you let your “dark side”/”shadow” run wild your life can seem uncontrolled and chaotic. Classic shadow signs are anger, blame, and laziness, but it can also be expressed as insecurity, co-dependency, or even independence. These signs can manifest issues with mental health, addictions, negativity, and low self-worth; and left unchecked, these issues will begin to effect the overall quality of your life.

Disclaimer: The purpose here is to help and heal others.

Before delving further, I just wanted to include the disclaimer that I am not a mental health expert nor do I have a degree in psychology. I have read many books over the years to help me deal with some of the trauma that I have experienced in my life, and these books were on topics such as self-help, psychology, and spirituality. All of my readings have touched on the topic of dark sides, shadow work, and how it all goes together. I thought I would share more about what I have read and learned along the way so that I can help others who might be of need. 

The idea of “Shadow” was popularized and studied by Carl Jung who is a 20th Century psychologist from Switzerland. According to him, “Shadow” refers to the hidden parts of our being. These are parts of ourselves that we may try to repress because they make us feel sad or vulnerable. This is a side we often do not show others. It can also indicate how we internally perceive ourselves as “being weak,” therefore we feel the need to hide certain parts of ourselves. Jung believed in the acknowledging our full self, including the shadow side, so that we can live in a balanced way.

Learning How to Confront Your Shadow:

My shadow is the fear of being vulnerable. I often avoid certain situations whether it is in the past or present; knowing that a situation may cause me to be placed in a vulnerable position, I would do anything in my power to avoid it at all cost. I think a part of it has to do with my upbringing and how I was raised. Although I’m not placing any blame on anyone in my family or those who have raised me, I was always taught that I have to be “good” all the time and showing vulnerability is a sign of weakness. I’m thankful that I am aware of my shadows because knowing the struggles and battles we had to fight in order to succeed makes our victories all the more meaningful. As crazy as it may sound, the pain and suffering we see in the world around us are often mirrored by our internal pain and suffering. It is only in facing our difficulties that true change can be made, and the hope of peace can prevail, inside and out. 

Shadow work may seem counter-intuitive on the outside because you will have to face your pain instead of running away from it. The process works by allowing yourself to feel and understand the painful aspects of yourself, so they become fully integrated. I’ve learned that it takes courage, time, and an open heart to face your pain, but these tools learned along the way help in almost every other aspect of your life as well.

Shadow work is an introspective psychological practice that anyone can do and helps lead to a more fulfilling life. When working with your shadow, you may have a moment of spiritual awakening that lead to greater authenticity, creativity, and emotional freedom. 

Some of the benefits that I have noticed in some areas of my life included: improved relationships through understanding yourself and accepting others, overall enhanced state of well-being and mood, better communication with others, ability to set boundaries in every aspect of life, and cease the cycle of self-destruction. 

I wish that you all find your shadow and learn to work with it so we can all live a more balanced and more fulfilling life.  

Xoxo,

Tawny V

 

serene sunday

Serenity Sunday = Mediation Work

 

 

Let’s Talk About Spirituality

I have always been a spiritual person, however the stresses of the pandemic, work, and life drove me be more in tune with my spirituality. 

It’s a common misconception that you have to be a religious person in order to be spiritual.  I think that there’s no single way to be a spiritual person and that spirituality is deeply personal. It’s in the moments when you are quiet, reflective, and intentional that you become your own teacher and guide. And it is in those moments that you commune with your own higher power and answers become clear. 

You may be asking, “How can one become more spiritual?” Below are several ways you can start living your best spiritual life.

By Helping Others

We are all here on earth to help each other. Help others whenever you can. Extend a helping hand, smile at people, open up your heart!

Journaling and Manifesting

This life should include self-love, compassion, self-gratitude, and appreciation. Think about the energy of desires, hopes, happiness, dreams, and feel-good intentions. Put these thoughts and wishes down in a journal or diary, and will them into existence!

Meditation

When I was younger I loved to mediate and would attend meditation classes with my mom every Sunday at the temple. Unfortunately meditation went out the door as life happens. Many years later I would try to meditate, but I could not stay focused. My mind was everywhere! Recently however, I was able to mediate again during the quarantine months, and even now my morning ritual includes mediation. So I thank the quarantine for this. Meditation and prayer helps us to stay centered. For beginners, I would advise you to set aside at least 5 minutes of your day to meditate with the specific intention of connecting to what’s really in your heart and just focus on your breathing.   

Learn to Forgive

Forgiveness is crucial for spiritual growth, whether it is forgiving yourself or someone else. Whether we realize it or not, we hold onto so much trauma and heartbreak from our past that it affects our present if we cannot learn to forgive and move on. Decide to forgive whatever and whoever it is that is holding you back. Only you hold the key and have the power to do so. 

Patience Takes Practice

Although I am into crystals and believe in their healing properties, you don’t need to go out and start a collection to become more spiritual. It’s more about taking advantage of the opportunities all around you. For instance, you’ve ordered a coffee at Starbucks and the barista gets your order wrong. Forgive them! Be patient. Things happen in life that we cannot control. These are just the little ways you can commit to being more patient.  These small steps everyday can lighten your spirit and create more inner peace. 

Focus on Gratitude

Life isn’t always fair and we are not all dealt with the same cards and that is just reality. Sometimes that guy in your math class who never attends class somehow manages to do better than you when you studied your ass off. It happens! Or there are some women who get pregnant so easily when others cannot. Life isn’t fair. But we can’t focus on just the unfairness. What we focus on is what we will manifest. Keep being bitter and things will and can only get worse. Focus on being grateful for all of the things that ARE going well in your life. 

Listen to Your Instincts

You have to learn to be in tune with your gut feeling sometimes to make informed and intuitive decisions. Our gut feeling is often always right. Sometimes you just get a feeling that you should stay away from someone! But most often times we ignore it and ask our brain to make that decision for us instead. Take opportunities and listen deeply to what is inside of you. 

Laugh Often

Laughing is one of life’s greatest medicine. Laughing carries an energy of joy, playfulness, and happiness. I’ve always noticed that the people who live a long life often laugh more and are happier. 

Eliminate Envy

Being envious is the worst thing you can do to yourself. However, if one had said they have never experienced envy they would not be human! Spirituality and selfishness do not go together. Work on being happy for others instead of envious of their success. 

Learn to Love Yourself

We are all living beings on this earth with different beliefs, personalities, and values. We have to first learn to love ourselves before we can love another. Forgive yourself sometimes, own your quirks, and love yourself a little more each day.

 

“Being on a spiritual path does not prevent you from facing the darkness,

but it teaches you how to use the darkness as a tool to grow.

– @Messages.from.beyond, Instagram  

 

Livin’ the Quarantined Life

Spring has sprung and we are now all forced to live in self-isolation. Not to worry, for someone who’s lifestyle consists of mostly being “quarantined” allow me to suggest some ideas!

MCQuarantine

Learn Something New:

Yes, sure you can binge watch all of your favorite shows on Netflix during your time in quarantine, and believe me I have had my share of Unusual Suspects marathons. But you can also use this time to learn something new. Nothing like being productive and doing something that can be beneficial towards life after the quarantine is up, right? What I did was try to learn how to cook! I am guilty of being lazy and always ordering food from restaurants via DoorDash, UberEats and Postmates! You name it, I have ordered it. I took this time to really improve myself. I found my new project, ordered my measuring cups via Amazon, and got to browsing simple recipes that I could try that catered to my budget and my taste buds. I will post some of the new simple recipes I have learned for those interested.

Rearrange/Organize Your Space:

If you are starting to feel anxious or depressed get lost in reorganizing your closet. Although my closet is pretty unorganized and hectic most days, this is the perfect chance I have to reorganize and rearrange my clothes. I even forgot about some of the clothes I had! I gathered up some clothes that I can no longer wear (damn holiday weight) and set them aside for friends I know would love them, some I can donate, and some to sell via the Poshmark app. I might even add a link of my Poshmark here if anyone wants to  shop great deals from my closet! 

Meditation:

I used to mediate often when I was younger, when I didn’t have to face any real life problems or heartaches. As I got older, I found it so hard to just close my eyes and breathe. Dealing with a lot of anxiety can really mess with your mind, so before bed, or whenever you can find 10 – 15 minutes in your day, try to close your eyes and just focus on your breathing. I like to hold my crystals and focus on my breathing while I listen to relaxing spa-like music when I am trying to meditate. Not only is mediation relaxing, it is also great for your mental health. If I am sad, anxious or need answers to things I try to meditate, and afterwards I find that I have am more calm, have more clarity, and my thoughts come together a little bit better. 

Although things seem scary and uncertain right now, don’t let it get in the way you enjoy and live your life right now when trying the tips above! How has the Coronavirus affected you? What have you been doing to stay occupied? I would love to hear new ideas and suggestions from you! 

 

The Holidaze

Although the holidays are supposed to be about spreading cheer and giving thanks, they can also be somewhat stressful! Every time the holidays roll around I feel somewhat of a panic and go into a frenzy. Besides the shorter days, the change in weather, and worsened traffic, I worry that I’m not going to get my Christmas shopping done on time. Sure enough, I ran behind on my Christmas shopping this year. I usually start around Thanksgiving, but this year has been even more hectic and chaotic than usual and I ran behind. Luckily I am done! But for those that are feeling anxious, not to worry. I got you covered! Below are some of my gift giving ideas for the special ladies, women, and girls in your life!

These are some of the things that are on my wish list that I would love to receive but will be gifting to the wonderful ladies in my life:

Pajama sets: PJ sets are great gifts. You can never have too many! Everyone sleeps, right?  I found some really great and affordable ones from Forever 21. Striped Satin PJ set $24.80 from Forever 21.

 

For the makeup lovers in your life: Too Faced Best Year Ever makeup Collection. This set contains Too Faced Cosmetic’s best selling products, such as the Better Than Sex Mascara and 3 separate eye shadow palettes. It also comes in a super cute limited edition bag with a step-by-step how-to glamour guide! What a great deal for all of these products! 

Image result for too faced best year ever makeup collection

 

Candles from Bath and Body Works: I find that Bath and Body Works has the best scented candles for the price and quality! They have a variety of holiday scents to choose from! Candles range from $12.95 and up.

Tiffany’s Love Heart Earrings: Great studs for everyday wear. Sterling Silver with the iconic Tiffany blue.

Image result for tiffany love heart earrings

 

Chocolate indulgence:  One of my favorite places to get chocolate’s from is Compartes, especially around the holidays! Although they are a little pricey, they are definitely worth it, and they make a great gift for all the chocolate lovers in your life. I would recommend the Holiday Truffles. 20 pieces $59.95

Image result for compartes chocolate

Bathtub Caddy: Great for the ultimate bath time relaxation. No need to worry about getting your Kindle, iPad, or book wet. There is even a place for your glass of champagne or wine! Available on Amazon for $39. 

BUY NOW: $39, amazon.com
With room for a wine glass and a book, this caddy promises the most relaxing bubble bath ever. 

 

Just a little friendly reminder, although gifts are nice it is not what Christmas is about. Remember to try to spend time with friends and family, and put aside all of your difference and just try to enjoy the holidays. I wish everyone happy holidays! A special thank you to those who continue to read and support my blog even though I haven’t been as consistent as I would like to be. Cheers!

 

 

Summer Goals

Image result for summer quotes

Finally my favorite season is here! I like to set mini goals or to-do lists for myself this time of year. These are some of my mini goals/to do for this summer:

-Drink more water: I can never remember to drink water throughout the year, but with temperatures rising it is extremely crucial to stay hydrated! I also like to collect new reusable water bottles to make remembering to drink water easier (haha). Here are a few cute ones I’ve had my eyes on:

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My latest one for this summer!

Berry Stainless Steel Cold Cup

Victoria’s Secret Pink

Kate Spade

-Wear sunscreen! I am guilty of only wearing sunscreen when I go to the beach or theme parks, which is terrible, because I live in sunny California!  Skin cancer can happen at any age with any race, so let’s all try to remember those SPFs! The sunblock I am currently using is Neutrogena Ultra Sheer Dry-Touch Sunscreen in SPF 100. I love how light weight this feels and it doesn’t have a strong sunblock odor. The packaging is also sleek and small, so it fits in my purse! 

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-Visit someplace new: I’d like to travel or go to a new place that I haven’t gone to before: Whether it is a new beach or new hiking location, I would love to experience something new. Even something as simple as a new restaurant!

-Cleaning: Every summer I always like to clean out my closet and donate clothes to the local charity. It is a great way to give back and clean out my closet to make room for that new summer wardrobe! 

What are some of your goals and to-do list for this summer? 🙂